My life right now feels a bit like the calm before the storm. It is similar to the way I felt right before I started nursing school. A week from tomorrow I take my NCLEX exam, which if passed will license me to practice as a Registered Nurse in the state of Michigan...so its kind of a big deal.
The following Monday I start my new job at Lakeshore Allergy. And so here begins the real point of this post. This job is a good thing. The schedule will allow me to be a mom still. Fridays off, no weekends or holidays. I will work late and miss dinner four nights a week, BUT I will be home to give Sophie her shower and do bedtime. I like the people in the office quite a bit and the clients seem agreeable. There tends to be a lot of kiddos because it is an allergy office, so I am rather excited about that as well.
However, the pay sucks, no 401K, no paid vacation, no life insurance, etc. Plus the hours decrease significantly come fall and winter. The most difficult aspect for me to accept however is that my former classmates who have jobs are all working in the hospital. Now not all of them have jobs, and I do understand that getting a job without a license is a major feat in and of itself. It still bothers me though that I do not have a position with the prestige that accompanies working in the hospital. I feel as though the assumption will be that I am working in an office taking vital signs all day.
Now if my new job paid as well as the hospital and offered me the benefits that the hosptial offers, then I could live with my less than stellar cool factor. I am writing about this here because I think Jason is tired of hearing my constant droning on, trying to rationalize why I should be content with this job...and then my sudden outbursts fueled by yet another former classmate scoring a job that I didn't even receive a polite rejection letter from.
So it has come down to this. My quality of life is declining due in part to the envious feelings I have toward my former classmates that I feel in some way are out doing me. Urgh! It makes me sad to even admit to being that shallow. So how can I change this situation so that I am more at peace with what I am going to be doing?
#1. I think that once I start working, my feelings toward the position will change. I will be nursing...and despite the measly monetary compensation, I am going to be doing work that I love.
#2. Eventually the FB status updates will cease...once we all have jobs, it won't be in the forefront of my mind constantly.
#3. The truth of the matter is that I will probably be at this job for one, maybe two years. After that I will have a bit more experience and I will be able to seek out another position. This is just the beginning of my career.
#4. I feel that I am meant for whatever reason to take this job. I found the ad for the opening randomly, sent my cover letter and resume only as an after thought, and was hired the same day that I interviewed because the doc felt like I was the one...and apparently she does not just hire on the spot like that. SO...maybe there are forces at work that are beyond my control on this one ;)
Okay, so getting this vent session out there into blogland has been cathartic. I am feeling much better now...and since it is after midnight...I am also heading off to bed. LUCKY ME!!
